Better Life, Better Me

This morning I took my 6 year old to school. Another mom asked me how I was doing. I smiled and said I was doing good. She saw right through that. She said she could see I'm in a funk and I need to doing something fun!

Do something fun? I already do. But I'm not doing anything that truly excites me anymore.

I want to better myself. Over the past 9 years of my relationship with my now husband I have had 5 jobs. 3 of which were with the same company. All of which were better pay than the last. I went through 2 pregnancies. Bought a new car. Bought a home. Started a business. Lost friends and made friends. And I will continue to look for a better paying job that will allow me to take care of my family. Connect with people who are in line with my inner guide! And continue to listen to my heart.

But that's just me. I am starting to feel like the man of the house. I hate to say this and I shouldn't have to! But when we take away the jokes and the love all that is uncovered is the same old bull shit that I keep trying to ignore!

I am unhappy! I should be the one working harder to provide. I should feel like part of a team! and I don't!

So my next step is to continue to better myself. Find opportunities that will open up more options to pay my debt and have a financially stress free life!

So step one! Get back on track with my goal to use Passion Party income to add to my Student Loan Payment.

My initial goal was to use my bonus cheques only. Allowing me to use what I make at the parties for our family & my business needs. But a few other things came up that I knew about but didn't properly plan for. I want to get back on track. This month I had to get supplies for my business after booking 11 parties so I used my first party earnings to do so. I needed new tires and used my last party to help cushion our account. I have one more party this month which should push my monthly sales to the first bonus level and I can use my party earnings for my vacation to Vancouver! Not to mention my BC party I booked!!! So excited! So very grateful!

I'm also needing space to think. I have a lot to forgive for my own peace of mind and I need time to do so! I need room to breath. I am looking forward to the ocean air, meditation time and home made wine! I want to take my boys to the beach and to a park and enjoy every second of it!

Change is coming! And I have faith that it will be for the better! It always has been for me! My life has always gotten better and every situation allowed me to learn and grow into a better person!

I accept this time in my life as a lesson and I am ready for the next!

For a better life, and a better me!