All I want for Christmas

Is a clean and organized house!

I've come to the conclusion that the only way I will get that is by paying someone else to do it!

If you walked into my house you would know exactly what I needed help with!

Kitchen, Laundry, Bathrooms, Toys...

That's it! I've asked, I've begged, I've cried, I've screamed, and I've written it out I don't know how many times between private letters and this blog...

I'm starting to accept that this is it! My life as I know it! I'm alone with this! Trying to teach my boys to help me and pray that they grow up and help when they are in a relationship!

I should have seen this coming. I should have realized it! But I was young and in love! Now I'm overworked and couldn't care less about love. I want functioning and support! I've learned by talking to others that the only way I could possibly get that is by becoming a lesbian! Really?

Tomorrow I'm going out and spending more of my Vegas savings on a new Kitchen Tap! I'm also going to toss out a bunch of shit I haven't seen in over a year just stacking up and of course work on laundry and start on my office!

I will have my clean house for Christmas. It's going to cost me when it shouldn't. I have people in the house almost daily that could save me money but... They are all men! So yeah!

That's all I want!