April Showers Bring

Not Spring Flowers!

April has proven to be a crazy, stressful, busy month!

I went back to work after my year off for maternity leave. I had to start looking for a new day home for Jaden for the fall. I tried to reach a new goal for Passion Parties and of course tried to keep my house from falling apart!

The Upside to this chaos is I'm loving being back at work!

The down side... I still have guilt! It was a very hard transition for Mr. J. It broke my heart when I went to pick him up after my first few days and you can see he'd been crying all day and hear it in his voice. I felt like the worst mother in the world. I was enjoying myself. My ego was also enjoying going back to work!

I was hearing things like "WOW, You look amazing", "O.M.G we are so happy you are back", "Great Job" and of course my favourite was when a new employee said this "You're Erin? WOW you are so young and skinny! I was expecting an older, bigger person coming back from mat leave!" Bahahaha Seriously?

So along with the guilt, I have being tired. I'm drained! I had 9 parties booked in April! 9! I held 4! My emotions were getting the best of me! Trying to juggle work, sports, dinner, cleaning, sleep and passion was taking the best of me! I'm sure Steve hates who he's living with right now! I've just been feeling like I'm doing this all myself! But really I'm not! We are both exhausted! We also all got the flu bad this month as well! That took us all for a ride! Having someone come in once a month to just clean isn't what I need. I need someone to come in once a week and tidy up too!

My mom told me not to worry so much about the shape of the house. "So what if it's messy! It's not like it's dirty and if people don't like how messy your house it then they can come for a visit and clean it for you!" LOL Thanks mom but when I walk through the door after working all day I can feel the stress on my body the minute I walk into the kitchen to get dinner ready! I can't make dinner with no clean dishes! If I cook then he can help clean! It's only fair! Everything has to be split 50/50! We both have two jobs! We both have lots of our plate! We need to team together to get this house in shape so it's not bringing me down which in turn brings the entire family down! That's not right!

But looking back at this month it wasn't all that bad! I cried, I laughed, I yelled and I have yet to find my sanity! But it's working out! I'm no longer stressing over a new day home for Mr. J and can now actually be a good friend and support them in their new adventure and move! I'm going to work on finding a new system this month for all of us to make it through a day much more easier! With Soccer on Monday and Wednesday Nights we will be out of the house more. My parents are helping out a lot on the weekends. Which is something I never thought I would ever happen! I haven't booked as many parties as I would like but I think it's best not to over do it! When I'm happy it all flows together like it should and I end up being on fire and loving every minute of it!

I haven't been able to blog at all this month either! I want to write about the amazing medal my son received in school and of course about my baby turning ONE! It's hard enough sitting down right now and writing this now that Jaden is up from his nap!

Here's to another adventurous month ahead! Bring it on May! :)