Up's and Down's

After a major high or adrenaline rush comes the low.

I am feeling the low!

I am also doing my best to do what I know I should be doing. Deep breaths, changing thoughts, positive mantra's... It's a bit of a struggle!

So I start analyzing my diet, the pill, sleeping, stress area's. I have moments of peace in my mind and then I have these slight anxiety attacks. The phone rings, someone asks me to do something, another pile on my to do pile... and. I. PANIC! I honestly just want to crawl into bed and not come out for a week! As much as I long for connection with another human in a girl friends chick flick sit in bed and eat ice cream kind of way. I want to speak to no one!

I've back away a bit! I am learning not to post woe's on Facebook! I'm trying to learn to just let it come and then let it go. Blogging helps

Month end is drowning me. Nothing is balancing. I'm hitting all red lights and bad traffic! THAT hardly happens to me unless I'm falling off my positive bandwagon! I really wish I could SCREAM! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Ok I feel a little better. I might need to yell for real in my car at a red light just to release this tension. But getting this out I'm starting to feel a slight relief.

I have to remember life has cycles! Up's and Down's. I've had a great 6 month stretch of Up's! Now I'm starting to slip back into that doubt. That I'm not good enough frame of mind. So why? Why am I allowing this to happen when I know it's not true? I've book a session with someone I've always admired to help me get back on track. I've also been contemplating getting acupunture done. Steve and I have been doing a bit of research on it for another reason and I'm thinking I just might need this!

What is the moon doing? I know it's not full...

Breath

This week I will:
take 4 days off work
finish tax prep
clean house (I might be begging for another human for a kick start support so I don't nap)
and once I'm calm I will book 2 more parties and follow up with consultant leads

Believe Erin! You are successful! You are strong! You are amazing!