Finding MY Voice

If you've been reading my tweets or my blog you will have some knowledge of my desire to write. I took up a program to help me "Write My Mess". I didn't think it would be easy but I didn't think it would be hard either. My mess is so big I am finding it hard to pin point a mess to write about. Where do I start? Do I pick a past timeline and how far back would I go? Or do I choose to write about my current life? My current frame of mind? WHERE DO I START... sigh.

I will probably have to go back and re-write lesson one again. I should be doing this weekly but of course LIFE got in the way and now I'm behind. But that doesn't mean I can't start all over again. 

Lesson Two is finding your VOICE... Your writing voice. All I can think of is it's that voice that is reading everything I'm typing right now in my head. That voice that makes fun of my mantra's that I'm trying to train. That voice that lists off everything I have to do or have done. It's that constant blah blah blah blah... blah! 

My voice is based on experience too. If something happens that I know about or have strong feeling towards it pipes up loud and clear! Oh me... listen to me... I know about this! Here is my opinion! HELLO! Why are you not talking? People need to hear this! 

I'm also trying to figure out how my voice and my ego fit together. I'm still on my journey to become at peace with myself and my surroundings. At peace with the choices I've made in life and the things I've manifested over time. Also to figure out where I will be not only taking myself in the future but my family as well! 

So where does that voice fit in? When will I finally say to that voice "Yes, that's it! Right there! That is what we are going to share!" 

With the idea of wanting to write a book in mind I need to figure out first what I want it to be about. The only idea right now is about my life as I remember it! My journey to NOW. But that NOW is constantly moving forward. I'm only 29. Why should I write a book now when there is so much future ahead. And then that voice or ego pipes up and says "Hello Erin, that will give you more chances to write more books!" 

Then that question comes back around. "Where do I start?" What's the bases of this book? What kind of energy do I want people to get out of it? I don't want it to be a woe is me type. I feel no woes about my past. And I don't really remember a whole lot either! 

Sigh. How to find my voice? not so easy